Questions that don't exist on Yahoo Answers...but should

I'm in a ska band and need to know where a large community of deaf people reside that have lots of disposable income.

I just hung fake testicles from my truck but I can't find a bumper sticker with the word "douche"in quiet big enough block letters. Can you help me?

I just played all of the Skyrim. I need someone to tell me what year it is, who is president and if super intelligent squid have risen from the oceans yet.



I take homeopathic medicine and think vaccines cause autism. How much would fire bombing a hospital maternity ward improve my image?

I still oppose gay marriage. Is there a time machine that will take me to the alternate reality 1950's I think once existed? Failing that is there a drug that will make me think I'm already there?

I named my band Dickensian Hellhole. Am I history's most awesome person or the most awesome god?

I have seen the film Herbie Goes Bananas over 200 times. Where can I get free samples of anti-psychotic medication?

I'm from Portland and need someone to cover my belt in thick insulating foam to stop me from hanging weird crap off it.

Arizona isn't crazy enough for me, is anyone trying to make Rapture from Bioshock a reality yet?

I still text message while driving. Would it be more economical for me to kill myself at home?

I feel I'm too hip for the South by Southwest festival. Is it possible for me to live up my own butthole?

I just bought my tween daughter a "pornstar" t-shirt. Where can I be sterilized?

I watch Doomsday Preppers unironically. What branch of government do I inform that I should never be allowed near a gun?

I created a keyboard macro that allows me to teabag in every single video game I ever play. Where can I get my fingers removed by sledge hammer?