My Ten Tips To Avoid Rape

Tip 1) Don't engage in or even attempt sex with someone that has not consented to it.

Tip 2) If you see someone who has blacked out from drinking, make sure their airway is unobstructed and refer back to Tip #1

Tip 3) When you encounter someone incapacitated from an automobile accident, call the appropriate emergency number, check to see if they are bleeding out and refer back to Tip #1

Tip 4)  When you see someone carrying some unconscious woman around make sure they are only taking her to get medical help and refer back to Tip #1

Tip 5) If you encounter someone who is in a diabetic coma, make sure they still have a pulse, call for help  and do this without sticking your penis in them (refer back to Tip #1)

Tip 6) If you happen to come across someone who has suffered a tragic chainsaw accident remember that maintaining blood pressure is of most importance, also don't rape them ( again referring back to Tip #1)

Tip 7) If you have to give a lost person on vacation directions try to get them to their destination using fewer than eight individual instructions and make sure none of them include rape ( once again we refer back to Tip #1)

Tip 8) A lost hiker in the woods is likely dehydrated so if you find one be sure to rehydrate them without trying to stick your penis in them (that would be Tip #1 again)

Tip 9)  If you encounter some guys who are going out to "rape some bitches" don't go with them, also call the police

Tip 10) Pretty much don't rape anyone you encounter anywhere